


Happy Ghosts

by Moontyger



Category: Star Wars: Princess Leia (Comics)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-24
Updated: 2015-10-24
Packaged: 2018-04-27 21:25:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5064793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moontyger/pseuds/Moontyger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's what passes for night on the <em>Lord Junn</em>, but Evaan finds Leia still awake.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Happy Ghosts

**Author's Note:**

  * For [avani](https://archiveofourown.org/users/avani/gifts).



“Don't you ever sleep?”

The lights had been dimmed in the common areas of the _Lord Junn_ for hours in order to encourage those aboard to do just that, but somehow Evaan wasn't surprised to find Leia's quarters still bright and the princess still very much awake. Working, or so it appeared, probably searching for more Alderaanian settlements that might have survived or planning ahead for the next time they had to avoid the Imperials. Evaan didn't ask, but she didn't need to. She hadn't known Leia long, but it didn't take long to notice that Leia never stopped working. Whatever else she might have thought about her, however much Leia sometimes seemed cold and unfeeling when she shed no tears and said so little about all that had been lost to the Death Star, she couldn't be accused of shirking her duty. Evaan couldn't say she understood her, but that much she could respect.

When she looked up, Leia's smile was kind, but tired. For a moment, she reminded Evaan vividly of the Queen – not so much a physical resemblance, but something in Leia's expression that spoke of her mother's patience and dignity.

“I could say the same to you.”

Evaan's spine stiffened at that response, back straightening and shoulders pulled tight, but she took a deep breath and forced her tense muscles to relax. Leia hadn't meant it as an accusation. It would be foolish to take offense, especially after Leia had refused to do so after her own far more harsh statements.

“I saw that you were still awake and I was just stopping in to see if you needed anything.” Evaan wasn't a servant, of course. She wasn't entirely sure what her role was; Leia had called her an advisor, then steadfastly refused to listen to any of her advice. But it bothered her to see the Princess doing without any sort of staff, handling everything all on her own when she should have had people to see to the little things, to care for her so she could care for everyone else. It offended Evaan's sense of how things should be and even if that sense could feel a bit foolish in these desperate times, was it not the very sort of thing they were trying to save?

“No, thank you. I'm fine.” Leia shook her head, but she didn't look away to signal a dismissal, so Evaan waited until she continued. “But you're welcome to join me.”

“Of course.” Evaan was tired, but not so tired that she would refuse the request (and it was a request, even if it wasn't phrased like one). They might not be the close friends Leia clearly wanted, but that didn't mean she didn't care. She wouldn't abandon her princess when she was feeling lonely.

Once she was seated beside Leia, she was glad she'd stayed. This close, Leia looked even tireder than she had from the doorway. “Pardon me for saying so, but it looks to me like you should have been in bed long ago.”

“I can't sleep,” Leia confessed. She was facing Evaan, but her dark eyes were unfocused, staring through rather than at her. “At night, when the ship is dark and quiet like this, sometimes I think I see them.”

“See who?”

“Everyone.” Leia said it so simply, as though it were obvious. “Palace staff, private tutors, people I trained with – people I knew my whole life. People I know were still on Alderaan. People I failed.” Leia looked away then, staring at her hands in her lap. Her voice had the telltale thickness of unshed tears, but her eyes were dry and her hands still. Even now, tired and clearly distraught, her self-control was iron.

“I've told you before: it wasn't your fault.” Maybe if she kept saying it, one day Leia would listen. “You're just one woman; you can't stop an entire Empire by yourself.”

“But if I hadn't joined the Rebellion or at least if I hadn't been so obvious about it...”

“You weren't the only one to join,” Evaan pointed out. “I did, too. You couldn't have known they'd go that far.”

“I should have considered it. I knew the other monstrous things they'd done. My life was mine to risk, but I hadn't considered what else might be at stake.” 

“We'd all heard those stories of Imperial atrocities. But you weren't the only one taken by surprise. No one expected this.” But Leia knew that, of course, when she wasn't feeling understandably overwhelmed. If she'd been short-sighted, it was no more than could be said of everyone else, including those with far more direct experience with both war and the Empire's capacity for destruction. Even when her lack of obvious mourning angered people, Evaan had never heard anyone blame her. Only Leia herself did that. “These ghosts you see – do they blame you?”

Leia looked up, her dark-circled brown eyes meeting Evaan's and truly seeing her for the first time since she'd accepted her invitation. “No. They don't come to blame me. They aren't even angry.”

“So they speak to you? What do they want?” Evaan didn't believe in ghosts, not really, but she was still almost envious. Even if it were all in her head, there were so many she desperately wanted to see once more.

“They want me to do what House Organa has always done – find those who still live and protect them.”

“Then you have nothing to worry about. From everything I've seen so far, you're going to have some very happy ghosts.” 

For all her initial doubts, Evaan meant it. She'd been as impressed by Leia as she had once been by Queen Breha; despite her very different manners, the princess more than lived up to her mother's legacy. The Ice Princess Evaan had once seen was just Leia's way of being strong enough for not just herself, but for everyone else as well. Now that they had lost so much - planet and culture and so many people that it was overwhelming to think about - the Alderaanians who remained needed Leia's strength more than ever.

And if being that strong meant she sometimes needed someone to do the same for her? It didn't have an easy title, nothing official like “secretary” or “advisor,” but perhaps Evaan had found her role after all.


End file.
